Have you ever watched any horror movie where machines go crazy and kill people just for fun? This travel story is like all others on our page, 100% true story. Any resemblance to all those fictional horror movies is pure coincidence. Killer Fan title suits right, I guess.
Like Always, Soft Start
We were on this lovely tropical island, where young tourists are searching for the meaning of life. Sometimes the search also includes some narcotic assistance. Nothing special, you know, some mushrooms for breakfast, and smoking weed with your favorite warm cuppa in the morning. Can you change your cup with a cold beer? No problem, my friend! This is an island where police sleep and destiny is in your hand. Unfortunately, besides the casual police attitude, also ambulance and hospital dig the easy-going island vibe — both of which we needed desperately on that hot day.
Meet the Beast
In the hotel’s beach bar is a very handy metal fan. Yes, completely made out of metal, including all ellipses. It’s safe to say that this fan is the oldest member of this place. If you are normal and leave it alone, everything is fine. This indestructible machine is doing its job and you can have a beer with the wind in your hair without even moving. But if you poke the fan with your finger, the fan will not stop. I know, it is stupid to poke it, but hey who wants to be the little bitch and lose a dare with a stranger. So we had this small accident where one of the guests poked it and lost “just” a nail and a bit of skin.
Luckily nothing “serious” happened, but the incident inspired the waitress to share the “poke-a-fan story” with new guests. “She did it like this…” splash, blood all over the guests. I think it was an intense demonstration, but a lucky girl only lost a fingertip and she was back at her job six hours later. Anyway, later that night, the fan stroke again. This time for real.
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Next victim: young solo traveler, full of puberty hormones and his standard medicine (alcohol and balloons). Somehow, he got too intimate with the metal beast…. I am not saying this wasn’t an accidental encounter, but apparently, his birth was an accident. Drunk and f****d up got his finger inside, and the fan never disappoints. This time it was a hard win for the fan. Poor guy’s finger was still on, but blood was everywhere.
So what now? How to help a man in pain? We didn’t have time for a miracle and took this poor guy to the hospital, which yes you are right was already closed for that day. You know how it goes; accidents are allowed only at opening hours. So, what now? “Hold my beer, I got this,” said the group leader. Bunch of helpers took poor sufferer back to the bar and gave him one big balloon to inhale. After that shoot, bastard passed out like a baby.
We Gotta Do Something
“It’s now or never,” said the cheerful drinking group and started searching for the sewing kit. After the successful find, they also became the fully qualified medical group ready to stitch the man. In the middle of the procedure, the poor guy woke up and started screaming in panic. “Leave me alone, don’t take my hand off…” were the most frequent pleads. To calm his patient, the surgeon decided to give him more balloon and the patient didn’t mind. After what seemed like forever the operation was successfully finished and the team celebrated for good.
No exception, everyone was happy and ready to keep the infections at bay with alcohol intake. Cheers “brave” fella and congratulations on keeping all of your fingers. But please remember that some ideas are simply bad. Poking a metal fan is one of those.